Competitive, much? Monday, Aug 31 2009 

A little while ago I attended a family event with BF and the rest of his family. Now, I’m usually pretty competitive myself. When someone claims I can’t do something, or that they do it better, my gut reaction is “yeah? wanna bet?”

I knew before that particular Saturday, that BF is way more competitive than I am. And that his brothers are the same. Only, I didn’t know quite how much so.

At the party, in the backyard, there was this sandbox for the kids. You know, to build a castle in and stuff. BF and his brothers decided to race cars there. Like little toy cars, that you ‘flick’ forward with your fingers. What are those called in English? Anyways, those are what BF and his brothers raced with.

They built this elaborate track in the sandbox. They took the utmost care in picking out their cars. They made me do the whole wave-the-flag start to set off the race.

There we had them. The man I’d have as the father of my children (were I ever to have any), a man I admire greatly and love more than my favourite pair of Christian Louboutin shoes, with his equally admirable, highly professional and very successful older brothers. In a sandbox, flicking forward little toy cars, dressed in suits and ties, and arguing over the rules. Rules that changed depending on whoever was last at the given moment.

The jury’s still out on who won.

And I though I was competitive.

The naked truth Monday, Aug 31 2009 

It is a truth universally acknowledged that everyone’s got wobbly bits. But when your 26, living, albeit temporarily, at your grand-mother’s, and your thesis has been a work-in-progress for so long that the professor supervising you took and died*, the least you can do for your self-esteem is to look good naked.

I’m meeting with my trainer today for the first time. She is doing me a personalised training program, and we’ll be going through that today. I can’t tell you how excited I am about that. I’ve nearly driven BF crazy with all my talk about that. I even bought a new gym bag. It’s pretty. Not like flowers-and-glitter pretty, a very stylish Björn Borg black small sports bag. Just the right size for gym gear, towel and some make-up.

But, and here’s the kicker: I’m not really one of those who consider it a good use of time to sweat your gut out for a few hours in the gym. I much prefer things like pilates. Tennis is okay, too, I should have picked that up again. But I haven’t played since I was a kid, and BF soundly refuses to teach me. According to him looking cute in the little outfits is not an excuse enough to pick up a sport. Excuse me? My own BF doesn’t want to see me in a snappy little skirt?? And yet the Sergio Rossi lace thigh-high boots were a hit? Inconsistent, much, honey?

See, the problem is not so much the size I wear (which is small). It’s that I’m not in that good of a shape physically. And that I have wobbly bits. I need to minimise the wobbly bits.

And with the help of my lovely new personal trainer, I’ll get right on it today! I’m so going to die…

* Too early for those kinds of jokes?

Must-Haves, part Post-Summer Tuesday, Aug 25 2009 

Current Must-Haves in my life:

Chanel jackets

I keep looking at others in the stores, but in the end, I end up with the staple of my grand-méres closet. Boxy or fitted, pockets or piping or color, they’re all good, and I love them. They go with everything, for everything. I just cannot find a better one. My current favourites: the ones with 3/4 sleeve.

Patricia Kaas

I can’t stop listening to her album Kabaret.

BF

He’s off to States soon. So spending every moment I can with him.

Paint samples

I’m decorating the new apartment.

Iris by Kalevala Koru.

How can a piece of jewellery, one that is for the mass market and therefor not custom made, be so perfectly fitting? Down to the name of the piece?

Ski Guy’s friend Elf-K.

That guy’s seriously hilariously funny! Might share some stories later…

On the move Sunday, Aug 2 2009 

I have, more or less, relocated to Old Dragon now. I think the only way either of us can stand the current arrangement is with the knowledge that it’s temporary. I’m getting my own place as soon as possible. The plan regarding that, however, is changing. I figured, that with the situation being what it is, of me having absolutely no knowledge of where I’ll be in six months, I probably shouldn’t get a too permanent of a place.

So I’ll be storing most of my stuff that’s not staying in my old place in a storage, getting a smaller place for myself for the time being, and reconsidering everything come January. Who knows, what will happen. In all honesty? I’m ready to leave the country. I miss Paris, I miss the States, I miss finding myself in a new place, trying to set up a new routine. I miss Rome and Prague. I miss the feeling of walking into a new city, an empty apartment and thinking “this is my new home. This is where I’m building my life now. Wonder what’ll happen?”

Until I come up with a temporary place, I’m stuck at Old Dragon’s, though. This should get interesting…

As for the move, well… It’s still in the works. Most of my things, the ones I need, are here now. Thanks to the generous help of BF and Perfect Morning-After Voice. Latter of which volunteered to pack my lingerie, by the way. I declined the kind offer and asked him to move the book boxes to his car instead. He wasn’t a happy camper.

After getting my books in boxes, and packing a lot of clothes, we were finally ready to move. I still need to go back next weekend, and pack the rest of the things, but those are secondary in importance. There’s some winter coats and linens and stuff, you see. I won’t be needing them right away. I hope. With the Finnish summer, you never know…

Anyhow… I’ve moved. I’m back in Helsinki. I love it. Better stores, more action, close to my dear friend E. We have a list of things to do as long as my arm already.

Most importantly, I’m now closer to the airport. Can you tell I’m so ready to leave the country? Only 6 months to go. Oh, 6 months and a graduation party.

Some updating, both you and me Thursday, Jul 9 2009 

Okay, so I’ve been away. On the Boat Week. Which was amazingly fun, thank you for asking. I managed to avoid burning, mostly by layering SPF50-billion and long sleeved clothes. I did get some sun, so now I’m all freckled again. Which is all good and well, I like them. BF is all tanned and gorgeous, which really isn’t fair. He was having a blast, and got along great with everyone, btw. I have to admit I was a bit worried. Not because I didn’t trust him getting along with my friends, he’s one of those annoying people who get along with everyone! But because we have a very tight group, we’re mostly known each other since we were 6, so it’s really hard for someone new to come into the mix. Especially someone who doesn’t speak French. But he’s learning!

I took a beating in our Scrabble game, by the way. My French vocabulary is diminishing, it seems. Need to pick up some books in French from now on, as well as fashion magazines.

Speaking of fashion, my Boat Week was cut by a very welcome interruption. I’m currently writing this at my own desk, back in Paris, after taking in some of the Couture shows for fall. Once again, I walked out of Jean Paul Gaultier show with a long list of “I want that!” We’ll have to see. There were a few changes I’d like, and stuff, but… I love his stuff, everyone knows that! You can always trust JP to make something that’s at the same time “wow” and somehow so very “me”.

I’ve been streamlining my closet this past spring and early summer. Seriously. I’ve noticed that what with all the house-hopping, being in Finland, France, couple of places in States, I’ve reverted to the American style of wardrobe. And that’s no good. Most importantly, that’s not me. So, streamlining. Which is something I must remember when checking out the fall shows, and deciding what, if any, I’m getting this fall. (I didn’t make it to the Chanel show, but luckily I’m able to catch up with what they had later today.)

It’s time for me to return to my roots, and to the cornerstones of my wardrobe. Having, using, and buying only things I can honestly say I love with a passion. Things I can say I’ll wear 5 years from now. Because that’s always been my thing. I just got lost, together with everyone else, to this buying frenzy of funny little things and chic little pick-me-ups. (Okay, the lace-and-tulle over-the-knee lace-up stiletto heel boots by Sergio Rossi were a justified buy. If for no other reason, than how much BF loves those!)

But that’s all about fashion. Maybe I’ll make a more detailed post later on about it, should anyone care. There was something else I though about… Wonder what it was…

Oh, yes! In my current “I’m loving the Armed Forces” thing, that was started by the HBO mini series Generation Kill, and carried further by the actual book Generation Kill by Evan Wright, I have been immersing myself to the culture of military. It’s really quite fascinating! The bonds that are formed and the comrade that’s evident is quite special. Also, the philosophical yet practical approach these guys have towards things like life and death, war and love and family, is truly intriguing. I’ll write more about my feelings regarding Generation Kill in my review-of-sorts, once I get there, but for now, let’s just say you should all read it. Seriously. Another thing that’s been interesting to see is the way these more recent wars, like Iraq, Afghanistan and to an extent Vietnam, are treated so differently as stories from WWII and other earlier wars. It’s hard to believe that war’s any different, regardless of the time, and yet the image that gets portrayed makes it seem like the actual battle has changed considerably. But then again, what do I know, I’ve never been in any war, I’ve never served in military. Which in turns makes it an even more interesting read.

I was recommended a book called Of Arms and Men by Robert L O’Connell, about how the development of guns and technology has changed not only the wars we fight in but the society. It seems really interesting, so I might have to check that out.

The Boat Week managed to get me back to books again. I was, once again, in a bit of a reading funk, but all that lounging on the deck made me pick up a book and get lost in a story. After all, it’s not like I was going to swim! So… I’m back! Interestingly, I’ve been feeling my old interest to philosophy return, which is great. I’ve missed that. Also, after an embarrassingly long spout of “I can’t really be bothered”, I’m into contemporary issues again. Politics, culture, society. I want to know. And with that, always comes my thirst for history. Which in turn might have been flared up also by the military things I’ve read, as there’s always references to history when you’re talking about war. So all in all, I’m feeling like actually activating my brain again, after a long period of “handbag shopping counts as a sociopolitical and cultural statement, right?”. In the words of J, “the Brain is back”. This should be fun.

Now I have to go, I have an appointment before lunch.

Yesterday in quotes Tuesday, Jun 23 2009 

Beth: I’m practicing first on my second ball.

Me: Dirty.

She was talking about her first attempts at knitting. Or so she says

* * * * *

Ski Guys calls, and as soon as I pick up.

Ski Guy: Are you making fun of my blog?

Me: No! Of course not! I adore your blog. *pause* I’m making fun of you.

*pause*

Ski Guy: Okay.

* * * * *

BF and I are meeting H and J for lunch. H arrives wearing a flowery dress. Like, really flowery. BF stands up to greet her. (Note! BF and H get along really well.)

BF: [H], you look… *he takes a closer, longer look* … like a flower shop threw up on you.

H *turns to me, faking indignation and sarcasm*: He’s a keeper.

Me *laughing hysterically*: And correct!

It wasn’t a good dress.

There are things money can’t buy Tuesday, Jun 2 2009 

I’ve always been a strong defender of the idea that if you think money can’t buy you happiness, you just don’t know where to shop. But there are things money can’t buy. Things no amount of shoes or new purses or jewellery can’t fix. And wrongs all the wealth in the world can’t make right.

The other day I tried my very best to pry a word out of heart-broken BF. Watching his dreams crumble is something I never ever want to see, yet I know that it’s going to happen again and again because of who he is, and how he lives. I threw everything I had to him: the funny ii, the kind ii, the crazy ii, the nice ii, the loving ii… nothing got a reaction out of him. I couldn’t reach him.

I couldn’t buy a skirt and make him stop hurting. I could ask DD for the plane and be near him, but I couldn’t fix things for him. I couldn’t buy him happiness.

Yesterday I stood in a store holding a thousand-dollar straw hat in my hand and listened to my friend on the phone telling me that one of our mutual friends had gone missing. Like seriously missing. Noone’s heard of her since last Tuesday night. And we want her back, no matter what the cost.

But we can’t solve this by money. We can hire the best detectives, use every connection we have to press for more police involvement, pay for all the public announcements we want, offer a considerable award for any leads. But all we really can do is pray. Not pay.

I want my friend back. I want BF to smile again.

I want my friend back.

Early bird gets the worm Friday, Apr 3 2009 

That’s what they say, anyways. If you ask me, I’m more inclined to think that it’s also the early worm that gets eaten, but no, you never ask me, do you? You should, really.

No no, it’s few minutes past 6AM, and I’ve been up for about 20 minutes now. And in my desperate attempt to stay awake I’ve re-loaned few books from the school library (conveniently done online, of course!), I’ve paid my cell phone bill, replied to Chimmy, checked the BCF and my email, caught up on Grant Miller Media (loved the piece on same-sex marriages being legalised in Sweden, btw!)…

Second cup of coffee on the way.

I hate mornings, everyone knows that. They also know that I’m not really a people-person before I’ve had my caffeine fix. And I hate getting up. The actual process of getting up, out of the bed, annoys me to no end. It’s so comfortable there, warm and soft and cocooned. The outside world is cold and harsh and one has to do things there. I much prefer staying under my blanket, thank you!

BF has perfected the “wake up ii”-routine. To see the brilliancy of his method, let me start by explaining how my early morning wake-ups usually go.

About 30 minutes before I actually have to get up, the first alarm sounds off. The snooze button has an 8-minute wait. There’s also one other alarm clock set to go off around that period (well, approximately, as it’s a bit of a gamble, you never know exactly when it goes. It doesn’t really go off when you set it to. But it’s cute!). In addition to that, there’s several reminders on my phone with varying intervals. The phone, together with the Random Clock are kept on a self away from my bed, so that I need to get off the bed to turn them off.

Eventually I do get up, after hitting the snooze for half and hour or so. I stumble, shivering (aren’t you always cold when you get up? why is that??) into the kitchen, where, if I’ve been smart, I have coffee ready, as my maker has a timer. Alternatively I wait, hand on coffee pot handle, for my first cup. After I get my first cup of steaming hot coffee, I get on the computer and pretend to do something (like, you know, play Spider Solitaire and call it ‘being productive’) until the caffeine has woken up my brain enough for me to go get dressed.

Now, the BF-way of doing this: When the alarm goes off, he gets up and goes make coffee, leaving me to bed. I usually don’t even notice this. He brings me a cup of coffee, only because he’s evil he puts it on a shelf so close that I can smell it, yet too far to reach without getting out of the bed. After I’ve had the first cup in bed, I’m more fit to make it to the kitchen where he’s making toast and reading the online papers and just being his regular ray of frigging sunshine. The plan is brilliant. It works. It’s also very very evil.

My goddaughter and her Teddy Bear had my favourite method by far, though. They sneaked up to me, shouted out “there’s coffee!”, the Teddy (yes, the Teddy, don’t ask) thrust a bagel in my face: “and bagels!” What can I say, I’m a sucker for bagels. Of course, “there’s coffee. And bagels!” became our new catch phrase after that. *laughs*

I don’t have any bagels.

Things to do, shoes to buy… Friday, Mar 6 2009 

… I’m having a very busy day.

I have plans for today. I have a To Do -list that’s long, and one I fully intend to accomplish. After few days of just lazying around, at most getting some knitting done (the Still-Nameless Wrap is turning out pretty good, even if I say so myself!) and wasting yesterday chatting with Beth the whole day (she had a crisis, she’s getting old. So naturally I was a good friend and reminded that her face is nothing compared to the stretch marks she’ll get from pregnancy. Aren’t I sweet? *laughs*), I’m finally feeling enthusiastic and energetic and ready to take over the world. Despite the fact that I overslept, as I’m on a screwed-up sleeping schedule after coming home, where I don’t go to bed until 3am and then sleep till noon, I’ve already written a chapter on my thesis, checked the BCF, and am currently writing this post. Writing my To Do -list. What’s on the list? I hear you ask. Well, my little curious ones, here’s the list.

1) University Computer Department needs a visit. Don’t get me started on the complexities of this whole thing, the short story is that I need to visit them to get the online ID I need to sign up for the exams I’m taking at this other university we’re cooperating with. So it’s administrative thing, let’s leave it at that.

2) While I’m at the University, I need to visit the library, and get some books I need for my Finnish essay. My own school doesn’t have them.

3) Before that, though, I should research the books I need, so that I don’t have to do it at the library. Luckily I can do that as soon as I’ve typed out this post.

4) As I’m going to be in that neck of the woods, I might as well stop by at my own school and fill in some more administrative paperwork…

5) … and return some books I no longer need to the library…

6) … and check out some econometrics books I need.

7) I need to tidy up at home, there’s some basic things like dishes and laundry and ironing. Nothing too bad, just pre-chaos control, you know? And there’s still some unpacking left to do. I hate unpacking.

8 ) I might squeeze in a visit to the gym. *passes the smelling salts to H* Yes, the gym. I’m actually feeling kind of good about this. And after the very pro advice I got (I totally used my connections and got both Ski Guy’s and BF’s trainers and physical coaches to plan for me, I mean, I might as well ask the truly pros, no?) I’m feeling ready to attack the elliptical machine and the cross-trainer. I’m not too keen on the weights, but cardio sounds good. So I might go fall flat on my face on the treadmill, today’s as good a day as any.

9) Crochet the hat I promised for My Friend Who Likes To Visit Third World Countries For Fun. Basically the same I’ve made myself in hot pink, only without the cap and in lion yellow. Someone stole her hat, so she needs another. I need to get it done as I’m seeing her (finally!!) shortly, and if I leave it to the last minute, I’ll just forget it. And driving and crocheting is never a good combination! So I might do that while watching Bones tonight.

10) I’m getting my thesis mojo back. Namely, the theory mojo, as I didn’t have any trouble obsessing over the trade deadline. Might write. Should write. Already started writing. I’m on a roll.

11) I might also start writing this completely unasked for and therefor all the better job application. It’s nothing grand, nothing amazing, but it could be fun. And right now, fun is very high on my list. And it’s not like it’s going to cost me something! Plus, it’s a job that could help me with the whole design-thing, which I still need to blog about, I know.

12) I need to go to the grocery store. I have absolutely no food in the house. Which is worrying, as I just went the other day. So someone’s eating my food. Must go again.

 

Now, how’s that for a list? I better get one more cup of coffee…

*kisses*

ii

Why I Should Never Have Kids Thursday, Mar 5 2009 

Are you taking notes, BF?

You know the Facebook Superpets application I said I’m addicted to? The one I posted about in here?

Well, the cute little puppy Hugo grew. And now he’s not so cute anymore.

So I deleted the application.

Y’all still think I’d make a great mother??

 

*kisses*

ii

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